chaching: (wouldtherealryomapleasestandup)
[personal profile] chaching
I saw k8's post and followed the link to get to here, the masterpost where someone tried to gather all the discussion. I've only read the first few and found myself pacing the room and decided I could save my carpet some grief if I just wrote stuff down.

First, I tried to approach it as a devil's advocate. I hadn't read the book either, so I was just being exposed to reviews and discussions on something I haven't read. I wanted to believe this author did everything on accident. The more I read though, the less I can give her the benefit of the doubt. While I do believe she hadn't intended to cause a fuckus, she most definitely removed an entire race from her novel's history, without showing how different the world would be without it, if the comments are all true. It sounds very much like colonizing America happened at the same pace as it did with Native American help, which rather trivializes their place in our history.

I pausing to write this up after reading this link here, which is only the third link down, because it comes to the real subject of my post. It reminded me of my own issues with identity, as other people might be aware of, and I've been dwelling ever since. I felt the same gut-wrenching as I read through the links as this person describes, that I didn't feel when past incidents like this popped up.

I would never claim a Native American identity, and I agree with the poster I linked above that not looking my native ancestry plays a big part, and there is a very strong feeling of not simply having the "right" to it. I was born in a small white town, with little exposure to any other heritage besides that. I can see the Native American blood in family pictures (my aunt in particular), but I've never been treated as anything but white. So identifying as anything but that feels like I might be trivializing someone else's hardships, by claiming them as my own, when I never experienced them.

Personally, I find that unfortunate. With such a large chunk of my identity hidden and unknown from me (this relates back to the BIG FAMILY SECRET we aren't allowed to talk about), I DO want to be involved in and learn more about the parts I do know. I'd just feel like a complete poser trying to fit in with that community, when so many people lay small claim to native ancestry (whether they have it or it's the infamous "Cherokee Princess") and don't do anything about it. I can even claim to know how much blood I have, since half my family tree is hidden from me. Mine isn't as immediate as the linked poster, but I can sadly not report with absolute certainty my racial "fractions," if you will. I'm either an 8th, a 16th, or possibly even a 32nd on the side I CAN look up.

The smaller the fraction, the less right I feel to claim it, even when back in the day, having a black person anywhere in the family tree meant you were black.

Maybe part of this desire rests on the fact I disapprove of the "white" attitudes and near-blatant racism I see here in my small town. By claiming a second ancestry, does that mean I can claim less racial guilt? Am I using it to help separate myself from "them," "them" being my local white community and their prejudices? I honestly don't know what the right answer should be, if there even is one.

So yeah, my carpet thanks you, LJ, for letting me ramble here. My apologies for how disorganized these thoughts all are, and if you read the whole thing, you deserve a cookie.

Date: 2009-06-11 12:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nozomi-chan.livejournal.com
I'm part cherokee too... either 1/32 or 1/64, I think... But I don't really claim it except when someone brings up the "oh, well, I'm part _______ " discussion.

It's hard to say what a person can lay claim to and what they can't, and I think it's probably just a very personal thing. I'd love to learn someday about my Cherokee ancestry, just for curiosity's sake, but I'm not gonna go running around talking about how the Cherokee were wronged when the white people came to America and forced them off their land and blah blah blah, because guess what? I'm part those white people, too.

So when people ask what I am, I could list - Cherokee, German, Irish, English, and I think a little Russian - but what I actually tell them is that I'm just "a good 'ol American mutt".

Date: 2009-06-11 12:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] godotbrewed.livejournal.com
Yeah, I'm all those things too (change Irish to Scottish). I like the idea of the American mutt.

Date: 2009-06-11 12:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nozomi-chan.livejournal.com
I think that's all most of us can claim and really be right. America is a country that, in my history classes, was called a "melting pot". The people that live here come from all over the world, and while yes, there are some that can claim one or two countries/cultures of origin, the majority of us are a mix of several.

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